Scenes from an Unsettled Mind was originally published on February 15, 2010.
I dream in vivid colors and bold action, multiple vignettes that fade on waking. Left behind are bits and snatches, impressions of the endless parade through my mind.
This morning, left behind was a sense of frustration. Of pushing and pulling, cajoling, trying, vying. Doing what was in front of me to do, only to find I’d made the wrong choice. Wrong place, wrong time. Wrong decision, wrong action. Wrong world, wrong life.
|Nampa, Idaho, March 2017|
Rising did nothing to quiet the frustration, bringing it forward in to my morning.
The weather outside matches my mood, dark gray clouds raining drops all around. Scooping green tea leaves in to a strainer, I immerse them in the mug I bought last year in Solana Beach where I’d run away to escape from my perplexing life.
So much has changed since then, I live in a different home on the opposite coast, have a different partner, different car. Yet, nothing essential has changed.
My life has been a marathon; running to, running from, running in place.
There are times when I feel I’m living out an episode of The Twilight Zone. When, in the quiet, still places of my mind, I have a sense of the world and it’s a lonely, frightful place, not at all what I’ve been trained (or want) to believe.
Click here to read the remainder of Scenes From an Unsettled Mind, originally published on February 15, 2010.
That Rebel, Olivia J. Herrell, writing as O.J. Barré
O.J. Barré is author of the upcoming BLESSED ARE THE PEACE MAKERS trilogy. Book One, COMING HOME, is complete and in query. The first draft of Book Two, COMING TO, is nearing completion, and Book Three, COMING FULL CIRCLE, is swirling in the mists of creation.