Monday, July 2, 2018

Happy Birthday to Me

JUNE 30, 2018:

Today is my birthday. Woe is me.

My body is older and out of shape, as is Starr Bella's, my sixteen year-old Mercedes C230. Yesterday on the way back to work after lunch, I proceeded through a four-way intersection. Out of the corner of my left eye, I saw a silver missile hurtling toward me. And slammed on my brakes.

Thank God and his holy angels.

The missile braked too, but didn't stop in time. Starr Bella took the impact in her left nostril—my driver's side bumper. Shocked and shaken, I backed up enough so the missile could proceed, then turned right (rather than straight as I'd been heading) and pulled to the side of the street behind her.

Rattled and not 100% sure it wasn't my fault—though I'm a defensive driver and usually know what's going on around me—I gingerly stepped from the car. A frantic woman rushed toward me.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" she gushed. "I ran right through that stop sign! I totally didn't see it! Are you okay?"

Relieved, I can now be magnanimous. "I'm okay. Are you?"

"Yes," she says.

And for the most part, I am.

We exchanged business cards (she's a realtor in a neighboring city), and I assured her that if the damage to either Starr Bella or I was more than it first appeared, I would let her know and we would file insurance. Otherwise, what's the point? Our fiberglass bumpers were scratched and scarred, my side reflector popped out of the socket and the edges cracked off. I popped it back in and it seems to be working fine.

As I drove toward the office, I realized my left arm was kind of numby and my head was starting to ache. So I took a right turn toward Dr Swaim's office, rather then a left toward mine. Luckily, they were also returning from lunch. I laid face down on the chiropractic bench and my sacral/pelvic area complained and my middle back tightened in a vice grip.

Instructed to put my left hand on my lower back, I barely could. My arm felt like a dead weight.

By the time he finished the adjustment, both I and my arm felt better. The headache subsided, as did the lower back pain and upper back tension. My left arm was moving again, but my forearm and wrist/hand were still numb. Back at my own office, I adjusted my elbow and wrist, and the numbness subsided. Thank God it was a quiet patient afternoon.

But daaaaamn. What a Friday. And what a crappy "Happy Birthday" from the Universe. Plus, my paycheck got hung up in LaLa Land, so no mad money to spend on yours truly. Nix that. Cash it is. I'm thinking I'll see a movie. Or two. Or three. Solo. Ocean's Eight. Incredibles 2?

And I'm hanging my shower curtain. And bedroom curtains. And thanking God I saw the missile and slammed on my brakes—otherwise she'd have crashed into my driver's door. And who knows how bad THAT would've been.

Did y'all know that I moved?

Happy July! And Happy Birthday to me!

~ That Rebel, Olivia J. Herrell, writing as O.J. Barré

P.S. For the last couple of days, my arm left has been sore and swollen. Both hands/wrists have ached periodically (from the death grip on the steering wheel), the left being worse. I was achy all over yesterday, but that seems better today. And I'm definitely looking forward to getting another adjustment today, this time at my office from Dr. Joe.

O.J. Barré is author of the upcoming Awen trilogy, a rollicking fantasy set in 2042CE that combines current, ancient, and future history. Book One, Awen Rising, is complete and in query. Book Two, Awen Storm, is in early edits, and the first draft of Book Three, Awen Tide, is in process.

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