Another Untimely Goodbye

I have a general sense of unease today. It started a short while ago, an hour maybe, tops. Soon after a friend told me he was going to Bogus Basin to ski today. The winds are up and as of Saturday, the avalanche danger was high due to lots and lots of new snow. I haven't checked the reports since, but I'm sure he wouldn't ski if he didn't think he'd be okay.

And that likely has nothing to do with my sense of foreboding.

Maybe it is the wind. Ever since living in Southern California where high winds mean Santa Anas and fires, I've become more sensitive. Or maybe I need some sun. I thought about breaking out my happy light (full spectrum light to dispel seasonal affectative disorder - SAD), but haven't gotten out of my chair to do that yet. I have donned my noise-cancelling headphones and am listening to Ocean Sounds Radio on Pandora. I think it's helping. As is spilling the beans to you.

My emotions have run the gamut lately. I haven't told you yet because it hurt too much, but my brother-in-law Don passed away a little over a month ago - the Monday night before Christmas. For those who don't know, and as a reminder for those who do, Don had a debilitating stroke in April 2018. He lost the use of the right side of his body and needed care 24/7, especially in the beginning.

For the last two and a half years I have lived with them, helping my sister Cheryl with some of the lighter care duties. It's been good for me. I'd lived alone for so long and for so much of my life, it felt good to be part of a family unit. And to not be solely responsible for the care of a house. Plus, I got to be close to Cheryl (or Cherry as I call her). And Don.

Now he's gone, and there's a huge hole. Not only in my house, but in my world. Don and Cherry had been together for fifty years, married for almost forty-eight. They moved away to Wyoming, but every year for most of that time I saw them at least once. Most years, I would see them twice - winter skiing vacation and a summer beach trip. Or a visit to Rochester, NY, for a family reunion.

Family Dinner at Ling & Louie's 2016-17ish

So, Don was as much a brother to me as my own two, Bill and Jon. Now they are all gone. Passed on to the other side. 

Yet, even after a death, time marches on. There were so many blessings. So many. And such an outpouring of love and support. Even now, six weeks later, the love continues to flow. If you read about his passing on Facebook or Twitter, thank you for all of your prayers. They helped. And still do. I promise.

Now we're all the way up to February. Time flies. Whether you're having fun or not.

Part I of The Druids of Marduk is written and disbursed to all those subscribed to my mailing list. If you aren't and would like to read this prequel to the Awen trilogy, click here. It will take you to the landing page where you can join my list. That will trigger an email with the link to my free book.

Thank you for letting me unload my angst. The sense of impending doom is still with me, but it has lessened. And I did retrieve the light and have basked in its glow for the last fifteen-twenty minutes. Soon I will dress for work. Then tomorrow, I will sit back down and finish writing Part II of The Druids of Marduk, and hopefully attack Part III on Wednesday.

May this new month see the continuation of the great awakening happening on our planet. Take care of you and yours. Hug them. Let them know how much you love them. And be safe out there!

Happy February!

That Rebel, Olivia J. Herrell, writing as O. J. Barré

P.S. The Druids of Marduk, Part II, will also be available for free to my newsletter subscribers. If you're not already registered, enter your email address to join my mailing list. I promise - no spam.

O. J. Barré is the author of the Awen trilogy, an urban fantasy with an alien twist set in 2042 Atlanta. Steeped in current, ancient, and future history twists, Book One, Awen Rising debuted July 2019. Book Two, Awen Storm, released May 2020. Book Three, Awen Tide, arrives late Summer 2021. And be on the lookout for her Awen prequel, The Druids of Marduk, available soon on Amazon.